We all have our own ways of communicating that vary by relationship and depend on the tendencies of our counterparts. In the workplace, those tendencies can affect the productivity, efficiency, and professional communication between coworkers.
In CrossGroup’s meaningful dialogue seminar, we work with companies to assess where their employees fall on a spectrum: passive, assertive, or aggressive. When we rise above the conversations and instead observe a team’s dynamics, we often see a mix of all three.
For successful professional communication, then, companies must work with their employees to mitigate passive and aggressive dialogue while nurturing meaningful, assertive dialogue.
Here’s what to know about professional communication and how you can foster meaningful dialogue in the workplace.
Professional Communication Descriptors
Naturally, we all communicate differently based on whom we’re speaking to and how they’re speaking to us, but at the core of all communication are three types of dialogue:
- Passive. When we are passive, we speak softly or not at all. We emotionally and mentally (and sometimes even physically) withdraw from the conversation. We may agree despite our reservations, which often leads to resentment and groupthink, where there is little collaboration and the best ideas are withheld.
- Aggressive. Aggressive behaviors include speaking loudly and interrupting frequently, demanding others’ approval, and using disrespectful language and intimidating tactics. Interestingly, this approach often leads to the same results as passive dialogue — groupthink and lack of teamwork — and harms relationships.
- Assertive. Assertiveness leads to collaboration and the best solutions. We speak in open, conversational tones and allow others to do the same. We make relaxing eye contact with our peers, listen to other points of view, and feel comfortable giving and seeking feedback.
No matter how passive or aggressive, we can all learn to be assertive. I tend to be aggressive and overly assertive, but those who have known me for years can agree that I’ve learned to adapt and grow. By encouraging assertive dialogue, we can promote healthy relationships, encourage professional communication, and produce results.
So, how do we learn to be less aggressive and more assertive?
How to Foster Professional Communication
Assertive dialogue is the foundation of professional communication. When we make an effort to respect each other’s ideas, collaborate openly, and actively listen to all points of view, teams — and companies — thrive. You can foster professional communication and nurture assertiveness by doing the following:
Value the Team
Our viewpoints and opinions stem from our unique experiences, training, and emotional baggage. As a result, we can all bring something different to the table.
You can encourage professional communication by creating a safe place for everyone to share their ideas and participate. Seeking each other’s opinions and evaluation demonstrates that we value one another.
Examine Yourself
Take a look at where you fall on the meaningful dialogue spectrum as you work and interact with the team. Some of us immediately move to flight, while others shift to fight. Listen to yourself when you’re stressed. What emotions are you feeling? What behaviors do you exhibit? In what ways do you feel unsafe?
Psychologists have many explanations for our tendencies, but the key is to examine your own stories and understand how you feel in those moments of stress and overwhelm. Then, begin experimenting with new behaviors.
Use the FIT Model
That is, facts, interpretations, test: State a fact that you observe, discuss the impact for you, and then speak tentatively enough to ask questions and welcome others into the conversation.
The FIT model creates a conversational tone, invites constructive criticism, and ultimately leads to healthy dialogue.
Practice Respect
Respect yourself and others. Make friendly eye contact with your teammates, give others room to state their opinions without interruption, calm your emotions, and seek the common ground of purpose (for example, the best product or project outcome).
Showing respect can be as simple as asking searching questions like:
- What do you mean when you say …?
- What are we ignoring?
- What do you want (or need)?
On a personal level, respect can help us grow and adapt rather than allow our actions and reactions to be driven by our pasts. On a professional level, it can lead to a more effective and productive team.
The magic of collaboration is the final result. Professional conversation won’t happen overnight, but the team that learns to work together to nurture assertive dialogue can become a company’s most indispensable asset.
Has your business successfully turned passive and aggressive dialogue into assertive collaboration? I invite you to share your thoughts on fostering professional dialogue in the workplace.